Ramblings of a delusional dumbass

    This is an unexpected blog post, and I never intended to write this. But this album "moved me" so much I had to write about it. Back in 1998 Ram Gopal Varma made, what is now a cult classic, Satya. Brilliantly written by Saurabh Shukla and Anurag Kashyap, by his own admittance, RGV really didn't have a very good idea of what he was doing (vaguely similar to the making of DW Griffith's Intolerance). Improvisations were a key feature in Satya (told ya, Intolerance), with the script merely acting as a flexible guideline, if you may. The  the Kristen Stewartesque acting abilities of J D Chakri was instrumental in turning Satya (the character) into an enigma. The hot headed gangster Bhiku Matre reminds me of Sonny from The Godfather, and Manoj Bajpai carried the role with absolute brilliance. Evrybody else on the cast were phenomenal, playing their parts just right. The music was just right. had they done it any different it would have probably sucked. That haunt...

ನೋಡಿ, ಈ friendzone ಅನ್ನೋದು skirt ಇದ್ಧಂಗೆ, ತೀರಾ gender specific. ಅದು ಕೇವಲ ಹೆಣ್ಣ್ ಮಕ್ಕಳಿಗೆ ಮಾತ್ರ ಸೀಮಿತ. ಗಂಡ್ ಮಕ್ಕ್‌ಳು ಅದನ್ನ ಉಪಯೋಗಿಸುವಂತಿಲ್ಲ. ಹಾಗಂತ ನಮಗೆ ಅಂತ ಬೇರೆ alternative ಇದೆ. ಅದರ ಹೆಸ್ರೆ ENEMY ZONE. ಹೌದು, ಇದನ್ನ ನೀವ್ಯಾರು ಹೆಚ್ಚಾಗಿ ಕೇಳಿರ್ಲಿಕ್ಕಿಲ್ಲ, ಆದ್ರೆ, ಇದನ್ನು ರಾಮಾಯಣದಲ್ಲಿ ಬಹಳ ಸ್ಪಶ್ಟವಾಗಿ ಉಲ್ಲೆಕಿಸಲಾಗಿದೆ. ಕ್ರಿ.ಶ ಅದ್ಯವಾಗ್ಲೋ, Mr. ____ರಥ, ಅವರು ಯಾವುದೋ weak moment ಅಲ್ಲಿ ಕೊಟ್ಟಿದ್ದ strong ಮಾತು ಉಳಿಸಿ ಕೊಳ್ಳಲು ತಮ್ಮ ಪುತ್ರ ರತ್ನ ಶ್ರೀ ರಾಮನನ್ನ fourteen years, forest tourಗೆ ಕಳಿಸ್ತಾರೆ. (ಇದು ನಿಮಿಗೆ ಗೊತ್ತು ಅಂತ ನನಗೂ ಗೊತ್ತು, ಕಥೆ ಇನ್ನೂ ಇದೆ, ಮುಚ್ಛಕೊಂಡ್ ಮುಂದಕ್ಕ್ ಓದಿ) (insert offensive honeymoon issue, or the lack of it), ಅದಕ್ಕೆ ಶ್ರೀ ರಾಮ ಅವರ missusಉ ಅವರಜೋತೆಯಲ್ಲಿ ಹೊರಡೊದಿಕ್ಕೆ ಸಿದ್ಧ ಆಗ್ತಾರೆ. ಅವರೊಂದಿಗೆ, Mr. ಕಬಾಬ್ ಮೆ ಹಡ್ಡಿ, alias Mr. ಶಿವ ಪೂಜೆಲಿ ಕರಡಿ, alias Mr.ಲಕ್ಷ್ಮಣ 'ಲಕ್ಕಿ' ಹೊರಟು ನಿಲ್ಲುತಾರೆ.  ಇವರು ಮೂರು ಜನ (point to be noted, ಮೂರು ಜನ ಹೋದ್ರೆ ಕೆಲಸ ಕೆಡುತ್ತೆ. ಅವರು ಹೋದ ದಾರಿಯಲ್ಲಿ ಬೆಕ್ಕು ಅಡ್ಡ ಬಂತೋ, ಇಲ್ಲವೋ ಎಂಬುದು ಚರ್ಚೇಗೀಡಾಗಿರುವ ಪ್ರಶ್ನೆ), ತಮ್ಮ ಪಾಡಿಗೆ ಕಾಡಿಗೆ ಹೋದರು. ಅಲ್ಲಿ ಅವರಿಗೆ Mr. Guha ಸಿಗುತ್ತಾರೆ,  a well...

I

Me : Hey, can you cook? Random person, who is not necessarily not a girl : Only easy stuff like Dosas, and Chapattis... (sheepish smile)  82.36% of all Indians, (88.75% if you take only south Indians into account) claim that they can cook Dosa with ease. Only problem is Dosas are not easy to make. Sure, spreading a ladle of dosa batter on the hot tawa and flipping it over is easy. But that is not making dosa, that is merely spreading a ladle of dosa batter on the hot tawa and flipping it over. By that account, i can open a bag of chips, doesn't mean I can make them! Actually, I can make chips (sheepish smile), but that is not why. Making dosa requires years of experience, a fine understanding of the cooking utensils at your disposal, and if possible a masters degree in advanced thermodynamics. It requires the patience of a saint. Not only are you making a simple dish, but you will be experiencing transcendental bliss, a philosophical enlightenment which will enhance your liv...

Most cookery books or cookery shows teach you how to cook exotic foods. Elaborate dishes whose names are just as exotic as the places they come from. You have these internationally acclaimed chefs with chefy sounding names like Heston or Nigella teaching you how to make stuff that they promise, will leave your guests wanting for more. Here’s the thing, most people, way over 90% of them, don’t try out any of those dishes. You know this. I know that you know this. How many times has your mother or wife threatened to murder you in your sleep when you try to change channels when they are watching their favorite cookery shows? I’ve lost count of mine. And how many times have they cooked any of those dishes? That’s right. He: Honey, quick! Turn on the news! There’s an alien invasion!!! She: Not now. I’m watching Nigella make chocolate stuffed chocolate balls covered in gold wrappings, served with chocolate syrup. He: That’s just chocolate all over… You know that stare she g...

     He lay in his bed. Breathing. Every now and then a faint smell of sweat would linger under his nostrils, and then flee, just before his mind could trace its origin. Was it from his shirt? Was it from his blankets? Was it from himself? He  couldn't  remember the last time he took a bath, or  he last time he washed the sheets or the last time he did the laundry. No, wait. He took a bath every day. At 12:30 pm, everyday like clockwork, he would go into his bathroom and take a shower for exactly twelve and a half minutes. He knew this, he was so bloody damn sure of it, because this was the only consistent thing in his life. He had been doing it for so long, and he had been doing it the same exact way, every single time, that it had become second nature to him. His mind didn’t have to make a single conscious decision when he got into the shower. He automatically phased out for those twelve and a half minutes- from the time he turned on the hot wa...

NOTE: This isn't directed towards You. But if the shoe fits... 1. Hmmmmmm............ 2. ok ok/ k/ okei 3. ya.......... 4. :) :):) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) 5. :D :D :D :D 6. LOL! (doesn't matter if conversation isn't intended to be funny) 7. OMG! :0 8. "Typing" "Typing" "Logged off" 9. Luv u dahlin :* (as said to other girls) 10. But I didn't think of you that way (as said to guys) P.S: You = any girl who's reading this. YOu wouldn't be reading this if you were THAT dumb. Peace \/..