Ramblings of a delusional dumbass

I’ve read several reviews of the latest (?) Darshan starrer Yajamana, but none of them got the point of the movie. I think this is the first movie to have suffered such an ill fate solely based on the collective inability of the reviewers to grasp the crux of the film. It is an intelligent movie. Probably the most intelligent one since A, or Upendra. I guess people just brushed this movie off as a shallow, no brains mass entertainer based on the cast and crew.   It’s as if a small group of people managed to change the perception of a movie among the larger masses with their power of social influence.   It’s like watching a Nolan movie in real time. Yes, on a surface level, the movie ticks all the tropes in an average Darshan movie. Where Darshan rides a Bullet, low angle shots of him make him look like a bull (in a good way, don’t lynch me), there are two heroines- a mod one and a gowramma one. There’s a “special song” with the modern female lead. And the act...

Some people call this tomato bath. The same people also call tomato chitranna as tomato bath. Well, which is it? Make up yer goddamn mind! But what are names anyway? Just meaningless sounds associated with meaningful gizantropitals. See, that’s a name I just made up. It means nothing.   But I digress.   Wash and soak a cup of rice in water for about 20 minutes. You can go all fancy and soak basmati rice. Or you can soak whatever is lying around the house as long as it is rice. In a pressure cooker, dribble a table spoon of oil and same quantity of ghee. Fry some whole spices till they are fragrant.  Cardamon pods, cinnamon sticks, peppercorn, fennel, whatever. Add 3-4 split green chilles, two thinly sliced onions, a couple of pods of chopped garlic and a table spoon of ginger garlic paste. This is also a good time to add a handful of mint leaves and coriander. Fry till the onions are translucent/ golden brown/ until you are happy. Then add 3-4 ch...

A post Matrix, post Children of Men, and pre John Wick movie that combines the best of all three worlds to give you a heady concoction style, glamour, action, and boobies. Roger Ebert gave this movie 3.5/ 4. “There once was a woman who was quite begat.   She had three babies named Nat, Pat, and Tat.   She said it was fun in the breeding,  but found it was hell in the feeding   when she saw there was no tit for Tat.”   Shoot ‘Em Up is not for the purists- either of cinema or of action. It’s pure madness on celluloid in its truest form. It doesn’t have the emotional anchor of John Wick. It tries to, it really does, but it fails short because we just don’t really give a fuck about the protagonist. Not even when we learn why he turned into a brooding, man of serious demeanour (?)- supposedly supposed to make us care for his sad past. Then there’s the style of the Matrix. It’s been done to death, especially in the time when...

Today, I sat down to write, with a cup full of coffee by my side Irish But the words wouldn't flow So I began wondering how wonderful it would be, If one could buy words for a pirce like the cheap liquor I buy at the cheap bar where the bartender tenders my poison in a glass bottle wrapped in a dark cover in exchange for some rupees without an extra word uttered between us. I return to my damp, dreary room crack open the bottle, pour out three fingers of dark liquid into my favorite coffee cup and top it off with freshly brewed coffee. On the table, it's set, next to last night's incomplete work. Knuckles cracked, nib licked. And as I ponder, the words begin to fill up the pages, as effortlessly as the warm liquid filling up my belly. So I write some more I drink some more merrily, until the words begin to choke again

Idi Katha Kaadu begins quite unassumingly with Suhasini (Jayasudha), a recently divorced single mother embarking on a train journey from Bombay to Madras with her baby son. Seated next to her is a “normal” family who have no qualms pulling each other’s leg, where the daughter is in love with a guy, and the parents know of it and have asked them to get married once their education is done but the girl is unable to clear her exams because she’s always too excited about getting married. In sharp contrast to them, is Suhasini. A Suhasini who isn’t interested in talking to the motormouthed lady sitting next to her. A Suhasini who doesn’t even bother react when the train she’s travelling in comes to a sudden halt- even when she learns that it was the suicide of a young girl under the train tracks. And when they say it was a suspected case of love failure, she only throws a courtesy smile, void of any real emotions. What we are introduced to is a woman who has developed a general apathy t...

Four ingredients- Potatoes, salt, chilli powder, turmeric (ginger garlic paste if you are feeling fancy) Peel and chop potatoes into bite sized pieces and cook them in hot water till they are cooked. When you poke a knife/ fork through the potato pieces, it should go through without much resistance. A non-stick pan (don’t use a non non-stick pan, just don’t) on high flame, add more oil than necessary and wait for it to heat up. Then, throw in the cooked potatoes, gently stir till the sizzle reduces. Add an appropriate amount of salt, chilli powder and turmeric. Mix till the powders are coated well on the potatoes. Let the potatoes sit for a few seconds and stir again. You can put the heat on medium high if you’ve got slow hands. When stirring, make sure to fold the potatoes- slide in the spatula from the side and turn the potatoes over. Go around the pan, repeating. Soon you’ll see a nice crisp crust form on the surface of the taters. Keep mixing till the oil is all soaked up...

Dear esteemed editor of #tv69, I am very disappointed in your lack of coverage about the latest development in politico-cine scenario in the south of the Vindhyas. It was an extremely shameful moment for me when my wife, who watches nothing but serials in the afternoons and cinema news in the evening, told me about Rajinikanth joining the politics. You see, I am not a big fan of Rajinikanth. His eccentricity doesn’t sit well with me. Especially since my wife made me quit cigarettes 30 years ago, but still watches Rajinikanth light up his cigarettes in “style” with her mouth wide open. I like Kamal Hassan. Nice fellow, very handsome and clean shaven like me. But even he is also planning to join politics it seems. Very disheartening. On further research with the assistance of Google, I came to know that even Pawan Kalyan, and Upendra are also entering politics! These days all actors seem to want to do everything but acting. It reminded me of my grand uncle, one Mr. Swaminatha...