Ramblings of a delusional dumbass

    Back in my day, Sundays always meant two things- Dosae and chutney for breakfast, and one Kannada movie on Doordarshan at 4 pm. This was a strict routine in most of the houses where I lived (and for all the five people who read this, where you lived as well). People would actually feign surprise if one had had anything other than Dosae (or an occasional Idly) for breakfast. Dosaes were served with chutney,and if your mom was in the mood, potato palya.    Chutney. There are over a hundred thousand varieties of chutnies, and I'm not exaggerating. What's unique about this humble side dish is that it tastes different depending on the one who makes it. If your mother makes chutney, it tastes like your childhood, flooding nostalgia in your mouth. If your disgruntled wife makes it, it will taste like her cries about your selfish insensitive self who doesn't care about of any of her needs and her tears. So sad. But seriously, if just want some chutney to go with...

NOTE: Wall of text. Text in realtime. I might still use this idea, so back off. This is me thinking of a romance story- Ok. Here goes. There's a guy. It's from the guy's perspective. Why? I don't know. Good. It's evening, sappy descriptions of how wonderful and romantic the ambience is, chicks dig that shit. It's drizzling, just to make it seem more romantic. He's left his umbrella at home and i s walking in the rain. They're picturing Gerard Butler not Seth Rogen so it's aww... A litter of puppies huddled up in the rain, he builds a makeshift shelter with a piece of cardboard that's lying around. More awws. Good good. But why puppies? Why not? nothing is a metaphor here it's there just because. Ok, next. The guy is walking in the rain thinking of his girlfriend- who's left him. Why? We don't know. Probably because of something he did. Definately because he fucked up. Maybe he didn't give her enough of the D   You can't p...

*NOTE* Women, please stay away from this post. Here, why don't you read  this  instead. TL;DR: Answer in a monosyllable, like you don't give a fuck and continue doing whatever you were doing. Most men to panic when a woman asks them this question, because they believe that it has no "right" answer. This is suicide mission forced upon them by women. I guess this is what goes on in a woman's mind when she asks a guy this question- "..." Exactly. Women aren't rational thinkers, their decisions are based on emotions, and they try to rationalize it later. Of course women will refute this, they don't want the other sex to know of their secrets! But I digress. I say "most men" because there are a  few of us enlightened folks, who know exactly how to respond to this without the fear of fucking things up. It's quite easy actually, in fact it is so simple that it makes it that much easier for us to overlook this. However, when confro...

NOTE: I had written this about a week ago, but didn't post it because I didn't think it was something that would appeal to teh general public. I still don't think it does that but I am suffering from an acute case of  "IDontGiveAFuckitis" so here it is. I don't give a fuck what you think about this, but if you are going to run to my mom and complain about what I do online just because it doesn't go down well with you it just makes you an immature and incompetent pussy. Seriously, this is the internet, get a life. The time is 2247 as I am writing this. A little sleep deprived, and a whole lot of self hatred and shame swimming about my aurashitpiss. I have a ton of writing work that needs my immediate attention, but I chose to do this. Arrogance? Dipshitness is more like it. Moving on... So I was listening to Rock you like a hurricane by Scorpions earlier this evening, while I was doing the dishes (yeah, i'm cool that way). I mean i wasn't even...

“If you make people think that they are thinking, they will love you; but if you really make them think, they’ll hate you.”    -Aristotle “If you suck, be the first to admit; it puts your haters out of job”   -Anonymous I get it, the movie is shit. I know, and I admit it. But this is not to justify why the movie is bad (If you really want to know, it was because I was ill equipped- technically and intellectually, the fact that you are reading this makes me a shitty director ), no this is to let you know of the tiny details and the metaphors you would have missed. These little things are pretty much the only reason why we made this movie in the first place.             Le me introduce you to the people in this movie first (the reason will be evident as you read on) CAST & CREW:             Written by and other behind the scenes work: Abh...

I found  this  on my FB feed. I thought it was a bunch of bull, so I asked the moderator if he would publish my views on the subject. He asked me to post it as a comment and assured me that the author would surely respond. I had too much on my mind to leave a lousy comment, hence this high drama. The disclaimer claims not to generalize or demean the traits mentioned, but it goes on to do exactly that. I don't find this article offensive, no I don't get butt hurt over goof ups on the the internet. But I do find the article to be stupid and annoying. According to the author, the only kind of guys women ARE supposed to date are the fat, unkempt, shy, butt kissers. NOTE: I am using the same classifications used in the said article, but will be writing my own views. So if the titles seem a little "off", that's not me. 1. The epic "ultra cool" dude: Now, because this was written by a girl, I sense strong passive aggressive lesbian vibes here. There...

(I added "in KFI" at the end of the title and then deleted it, because in my opinion, some of the best Gangster flicks made in Kannada have been some of the best I've watched) For one, it is a timeless modern classic. Seriously you could come back to this in, say five years, and it will still manage to blow you away (trust me, I know what i'm talking about here). You guys remember Om? Well this is in that league, only sexier. The movie is faster, edgier and sleeker than any you have seen in KFI. The movie grabs you by the collar and pulls you right in. No foreplay, no caressing, you get right into the good parts. After the initial high, the audience is allowed to breath a little. Just when you are getting comfortable, you are taken through another roller coaster ride. Getting two songs back to back was a good thing. One does not have to worry about the break in narration by songs until after the interval, and even then the song fits right in (Ugramm Veeram \m/)....

I wonder why it's called butter milk. It's made from yogurt, and the butter's been removed. Why don't we just call it low fat, no butter yogurt? Another one of life's great mysteries. Anyway, by the end of this post you must have the theoretical know hows of how to make a decent to half decent, scratch that, you will know how to make the best fucking majjige you have ever tasted. It will be so good, you will want to live on a majjige diet for the rest of your life. Why do you think i'm so lean , and sexy.                         This is me, minus the pretty face, abs, and I usually have my pants on at all times. This is a really simple recipe.  You don't have to turn on the stove at least, there by cutting down the risk of accidentally burning the house down to zero. Unless you really do want to burn the hose down and are using this as an excuse. Which is cool by me. Just don't blame me. There are two ways to make b...

They cry, they shout they squeal, and they yell those empty threats, and cocky retorts makes you wonder if they ever evolved offended by things that is beyond their comprehension they don't get it they don't even try but they complain, oh how they complain! makes you wonder why they aren't locked up in cages internet trolls they're unwanted, undesired but they come in uninvited polluting healthy discussions with hatred and stupidity ruining it for everyone involved why don't they go away? why don't they mind their own business? more importantly, why do they multiply?