Skip to main content

SJPU(ke)- uno

Studying the CBSE syllabus has it's perks. You're already familiar with half the 1st PU portions. You can boast about having read Wordsworth and Coleridge and that guy who wrote Road Not Taken.
The downside is that the results arrive about a month after the state board results. And that means getting an admission into a PU college becomes a massive pain in the ass. Each college plays by it's own rules-

"sorry sir, friday was the last date to apply. you should've furnished a letter earlier, stating that you are from cbse"- and you should've told that to me when i paid you a hundred bucks for that admission form. Why, i could've just thrown my hundred bucks into the dustbin last week itself, no?

"you better join 11th standard, and continue in cbse"- why, is your college too dumb for me?

"sorry, there are a hundred students in a class already"- and you think one more is gonna make a difference?

So at this point, i had to make do with what ever college i could get into. And the only college that was available was SJPUC (for the record, i don't come with a 'josephite' tag. i only studied there, that's all). With a history that spans over a hundred and twenty five years. A huge campus located right in the middle of the city. Multipe pubs and booze joints in a radius of just under a kilometer from the campus. Of course i only realized all this after i joined the college. It was not until the first day of college that i realized another painful truth- SJPUC is an all boys college.
(superimpose stock footage of sea waves crashing into the rocks, volcano erupting violently)
After that, two years went by slower than a dead snail crawling on marmalade.
(WARNING! On spot bad poetry)
Smitha and Latha had no idea what they were doing/
Jayanna had neat handwriting/
Sudhindra was mute/
and no one was cute.

Except Renuka Zacharia (If you think Vahidunissa was better, then we'll have to settle this at DTP). RZ was the one who interviewed me when i went there for my admissions. I still remember how it went-

RZ: So, why SJPUC?

Me: Because it is one of the best colleges...

RZ: Who told you it is the best college?! (that was my first clue. I should've beat it when i had the chance *sigh*)

She then continued to ask me about where i live and what my hobbies are yada yada yada...

I was called into the principal's chamber when my turn came. It was the vice princie's chamber actually. And behind the small table, covered in a green table cloth, sat three people- Rev. Fr. Whatshisname, pastor (?) of sjpuc, a balding guy with exactly four strands of grey hair sticking out on the sides of his head. Principal. Rev. Fr. Melvin Mendonca (it's pronounced MendonZA, as in 1- 1 za 1, 1- 2 za 2 etc), a little over 5 feet, meticulously trimmed french beard and brown eyes. Easy there ladies, it's not the sexy kind. And Vice Principal Albert Antony, who is THE most bad ass teacher i've ever come across. I'd go through PUC once again just to sit through this guys lectures.

They spoke of what the college stands for, about the fees, about discipline, about the fees, about the dress code and about the fees.
Once the fees was paid and I was in, that's when everything changed for the worse...

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Rock you like a hurricane- Meaning and analysis (WARNING! NSFW, NSFSP)

NOTE: I had written this about a week ago, but didn't post it because I didn't think it was something that would appeal to teh general public. I still don't think it does that but I am suffering from an acute case of  "IDontGiveAFuckitis" so here it is. I don't give a fuck what you think about this, but if you are going to run to my mom and complain about what I do online just because it doesn't go down well with you it just makes you an immature and incompetent pussy. Seriously, this is the internet, get a life. The time is 2247 as I am writing this. A little sleep deprived, and a whole lot of self hatred and shame swimming about my aurashitpiss. I have a ton of writing work that needs my immediate attention, but I chose to do this. Arrogance? Dipshitness is more like it. Moving on... So I was listening to Rock you like a hurricane by Scorpions earlier this evening, while I was doing the dishes (yeah, i'm cool that way). I mean i wasn't even

Clubhouse. CoWin. China.

If you feel an odd sense of deja vu while reading this piece, then you've spent too much time switching between Facebook and Clubhouse. Unless you've been living underground or in a home with ACT broadband, you know what Clubhouse is - it is where many people can have their Mann ki Baat at once. And Facebook has turned into a platform to critique, analyse and make fun of discussions that happen on Clubouse. Congrats Clubhouse, you just replaced the Indian Government, at least as far as Facebook discourses go. Clubhouse is more or less an impulsive, live podcast session - an open space where everyone is made to feel like Joe Rogan. But no one talks about DMT or shaved gorillas or MMA or shaved gorillas doing MMA while on DMT. But it always does sound like everyone is on something stronger than the devil's lettuce. Maybe you need that to hear your own thoughts over the din of uncomprehensive ramblings and mouth-breathing noises. Speaking of noises, Saudi Arabia restricted the

The end; and a new beginning

          Before I chew your mind : This blog post is in response to my friend Harish’s vlog . He had done a “user request vlog” once, and I had suggested a topic- ‘ How did you start doing something ’(links at the end). I also promised him that I’d write a blog post on that subject if he ever did that video. He did make that video (he makes some pretty cool game play videos as well, worth checking it out if you are a gamer), and that’s why you find yourself reading this right now.             I think I had an idea of what I would write about when I gave him the topic. However, for the love of God (or Batman) I can’t seem to remember what that was. I’m making it up with this one, hope it’s ok bro :) FADE IN: Superimpose “THE END” on black background FADE OUT TO BLACK: <insert new title>           This is where I (along with a bunch of other confused mortal souls my age) have reached. A point where one movie seems to end and another begins- a double featur